4 A’s of Stress Management-Avoid, Alter, Adapt, Accept

4 A’s of Stress Management-Avoid, Alter, Adapt, Accept

1. Avoid Unnecessary Stress

It is best idea to avoid person, situation or anything which makes you tense. Not all stressors can be avoided; however, you can eliminate number of stressors.

i. Avoid People who stress you out: If someone consistently causes stress in your life, limit the amount of time you spend with that person or end the relationship entirely.

ii. Avoid Hot-button topics: If you get upset over religion or politics, or any topic, cross them off your conversation list. Don’t repeatedly argue about the same subject with the same person, stop bringing it up or excuse yourself when it is the topic of discussion.

iii. Take control of your Environment: if the evening news makes you anxious, turn the TV off. If traffic’s got you tense, take a longer but less-traveled route. If going to the market is an unpleasant chore, do your grocery shopping online.

iv. Avoid additional responsibility-learn to say “no”: know your limits and stick to them whether in your personal or professional life, refuse to accept added responsibilities. Taking on more than you can handle is a surefire recipe for stress.

v. Prioritize your to-do list: Analyze your schedule, responsibilities and daily tasks. If you have got too much on your plate, distinguish between the “shoulds” and the “musts”. Drop tasks that aren’t necessary to the bottom of the list or eliminate them entirely.

2. Alter the Situation

If you can’t avoid a stressful situation, be brave enough to try to alter it. Figure out what you can do to change things so the problem doesn’t present in the future. Often, this involves changing the way you communicate and operate in your daily life.

i. Express your Feelings instead of bottling them up: If someone is bothering you, communicate your concern in an open and respectful way. If you don’t voice your feeling, resentment will build and the situation will likely remain the same.

ii. Be Willing to Compromise: When you ask someone to change their behavior, be willing to do the same. If you both are willing to bend at least a little, you will have a good chance of finding a happy middle ground.

iii. Be more Assertive: Don’t take a backseat in your own life. Deal with problems head on, doing your best to anticipate and prevent them.

iv. Manage Your Time better: Poor time management can cause a lot of stress. When you are stretched too thin and running behind, it’s hard to stay calm and focused. But if you plan ahead and make sure you don’t overextend yourself, you can alter the amount of stress you are under.

3. Adapt to the stressor

If you can’t change the stressor, change yourself. You can adapt to stressful situations and regain your sense of control by changing your expectations and attitude.

i. Reframe Problems though Positive Thinking: Try to view stressful situations from a more positive perspective. Rather than fuming about a traffic jam, look at it as an opportunity to pause and regroup, listen to your favorite radio station, or enjoy some alone time.

ii. Look at the Big Picture: Take perspective of the stressful situation. Ask yourself-How important it will be in the long run. Will it matter in a month? A year? Is it really worth getting upset over? If the answer is no, focus your time and energy elsewhere.

iii. Adjust your Standards: Perfectionism is a major source of avoidable stress. Don’t expect too much, set reasonable standards for yourself and others, and learn to be okay with “good enough”.

iv. Focus on the Positive: When stress is getting you down, take a moment to reflect on all the things you appreciate in your life, including your own positive qualities and gifts.

How you think can have a profound effect on your emotional and physical well-being. Each time you think a negative thought about yourself, your body reacts as if it were in the throes of a tension-filled situation. If you see good things about yourself, you are more likely to feel good, the reverse is also true.

4. Accept the things you can’t change

Some sources of stress are unavoidable. You can’t prevent or change stressors such as the death of a loved one, a serious illness, or a national recession. In such cases, the best way to cope with stress is to accept things as they are. Build serenity and courage to accept the uncontrollable stressor. Acceptance may be difficult, but in the long run, it’s easier than railing against a situation you can’t change.

i. Be Brave-build your strength to face and accept: As the saying goes, “What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger”. When facing major challenges, try to look at them as opportunities for personal growth. If your own poor choices contributed to a stressful situation, reflect on them and learn from your mistakes.

ii. Don’t try hard to control the uncontrollable: Many things in life are beyond our control-particularly the behavior of other people. Rather than stressing out over them, focus on the things you can control such as the way you choose to react to problems.

iii. Share your feelings: Talk to a trusted friend or make an appointment with a therapist. Expressing what you are going through can be very cathartic, even if there is nothing you can do to alter the stressful situation.

iv. Learn to Forgive: Accept the fact that we live in an imperfect world and that people make mistakes. Let go of anger and resentments. Free yourself from negative energy by forgiving and moving on.